It’s like something else has got control of your body. ![]() When you feel a meltdown rising inside you, part of you knows you must hold it in and you try so hard, you can even think (at an early enough stage) that you might feel embarrassed afterwards and know that you will wish you hadn’t had the meltdown, but if the trigger remains there is nothing you can do. Someone said something insightful the other day, that for an autistic child at school, they are like a bottle of cola that is getting shaken a bit, periodically throughout the day, and if you don’t lift the lid to let a few bubbles out every so often, by the time the child gets home (where they feel safe) their attempts at bottling it in can be stopped and it all explodes out. You can’t think of anything else, all you can think of is you want it to stop. ![]() If someone or something prevents that, the meltdown rises higher. You feel something bubbling up inside you that you don’t have any control over, you feel panic and you want to flee the situation/trigger. For me, people refusing to listen or understand me is a difficult one, as well as noise, or feeling trapped or controlled. Stress over something builds up, it can be anything, autistic people are all different and have different triggers. Meltdowns can affect any age of individual on the autistic spectrum, they are not the preserve of the child! They aren’t tantrums, the reasons for them are totally different and they are not about demanding attention or histrionics.
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